I don't know why, why I am sulking...I felt that I couldn't try to change people mind and their thinking.

I felt no one really could believe me, mostly my friends refrained from talking to me...My heart is so gloomy and so does my world. I told to someone special that I would change to be the better person and told him that I would help others when in needed.

I-I don't know what to say or try to prove to you, but somehow I felt so affectionate about something. I felt I really need to change my friends thoughts and even adults somehow.

Sometimes, people just don't know how fortunate they are. They do complained that their life is miserable, unwanted or deprive...Let me say what I feel. I felt that some of my friends has siblings but they don't know how to cherish them, they have a pet and they ignored it, they have such loving and caring parents and yet they are angry about it, they have good friends but yet they did not realize...

To me...I felt I am the opposite of what I have written. I felt a lack of communication between my father and everyday I would cry within my heart and thought - Please...Please make my Dad and I forever happy - I cried and cried...I had no siblings and prayed to God, and told him please let me have a best friend. I cried whenever I saw someone who has siblings, the pain is so crucial and excruciating. I told my mother I wanted a dog, but she was afraid and she denied it. I cried too...because she's not feeling well thus she denied it...I went to school, hoping someone would talk to me and make my life happier than ever, but all I knew was betrayal, disloyalty, and sometimes my friends would act childish...They would keep quiet and won't talk to me, and I felt so terrbily hurt.

I sulked and sulked, I wanted everything but What I really wanted was my parents to have good blessings...I love them so much. I remember once, there was a parent meeting session. My mother came, and one of my friends said, "Is that your grandmother? She looked old." I felt so hurt when I heard that. Everyday I would go straight home and brood my unhappiness...

I-I...I wanted everything to be good for everyone, I want people to understand who I really am and how I feel. I don't want to be such a rotten person...I want to help people, I - (Crying) - Want everybody out there to be understanding and reasonable.

-(Unable to continue)-